Choices in a Topsy Turvy World

There was once an ezine which I wrote for - desijournal.com - and the article below was in response to Dr. M. Vidyasagar's article about India vs. America. Obviously, Bangalore-based Vidyasagar (who is now - I think - a VP at Tata Consultancy Services, aka TCS) came down in favor of India. In light of several families of Indian origin in the region - and possibly around the US - returning to India, I thought I would reexamine the issue. After all, we are living in a topsy-turvy world.

Who knows what choices lie before us in 2009 and beyond? I am quite surprised at my insight of 5 years ago, when I said: "My current situation directs me to choose the US - who knows what the future holds?" And my ignorance in saying that "We in America have everything in plenty." :(

Choice. It is the critical issue in the article by Dr. M Vidyasagar. He considers careers and the job market, the rupee and the standard of living, the economy and the entrepreneurial opportunities - and finds the choice of living in India a more viable option than immigrating to the US. He concedes that the US has the best universities in the world, but doesn't point out how that translates into a choice.


For many of us, there is no choice on the India vs. America issue. Once you have kids here, is it really feasible to ask them to pick up and move to a country to which their connections - through typical biannual visits - are, at best, tenuous? The difference in treatment they will face as residents, not visitors, is radical. I experienced this first-hand, when my parents moved our family to India in 1981 – and find it a no-choice issue given my American pragmatism.


Let us, for a moment, assume that there is a choice about whether to live in India or America. Let us also accept all of Dr. Vidyasagar's contentions. Now, look at the decision from other viewpoints - not from solely economic perspectives. As a parent, I want to provide my children the best opportunities in life. By my typically desi standards, this means the best education money can buy.
People in India tell me that secondary education is much better there. Having been schooled in the United States, I feel that education is fostering the love of learning in our children. For them, I am willing to forego the negatives of living in the US - that they don't have their grandparents nearby, that they may encounter racial prejudice, that we are not mainstream Americans, and that education is going to cost a lot of money. I see people like Governor (of Washington state) Gary Locke, and I believe in the American dream – and strive to help my children make the right choices.


As a person, I am concerned with tangible living conditions. I read Elisabeth Bumiller's book May You be the Mother of A Hundred Sons and felt validated. She points out that physical resources in India - mainly water - are in shortage, and there is no solution in sight. We in America have everything in plenty.


Last week, my father told my daughter in our weekly phone call to Hyderabad, "Don't let America spoil you." How can I disagree? But I get simple satisfaction from a long, hot shower, and choose the comforts of the USA.


As a woman, I am also concerned with intangible living conditions. In the US, I worry about teenage pregnancy, the rising popularity of reality shows and the related voyeurism. But is the sexual suppression that occurs in India acceptable? What about the lack of governance and the corruption inherent in the Indian system? Again, here is a choice - we in the US have freedom, and the responsibility to choose wisely.


As an immigrant of color, I am worried about the current racial climate in the US. There are prejudices one faces in every human situation – Bollywood is still so full of nepotism, the caste system is still cause for concern, there are still inter-religious tensions all over India. So this time it is a tradeoff - one kind of racism for another.


Although my choices seem so black and white on paper, the boundaries are blurred. My current situation directs me to choose the US - who knows what the future holds? Given the political climate here, I may have no choice. As long as my favorite premise on which the US stands - liberty and justice for all - holds true, I will stay an Indian American. Read more Entry>>

Pluralism is the Password for Peace

I wrote this piece for NPR's This I believe this past summer, after a significant loss in my life - someone who has been part of the second set of parents that I have been gifted with. She passed away before she had the opportunity to share all the experiences she could have had with her family. I decided that my essay had to be written to share my core beliefs, if I too got taken away from my children earlier than expected. I thought it is fitting that as I begin this blog, my first post speaks from the heart about something that embodies me.

Pluralism is the Password for Peace

Padma Kuppa, Troy, MI

July 2008

I am an interfaith activist. As a founder and board member of various social justice organizations, I organize and participate in activities where spiritual understanding and cooperation are fostered by people of all faiths.

Born in India, I arrived in New York to start kindergarten in 1970, and lived for the next 11 years in the Northeast. My parents’ eclectic approach to ritual and religion was enhanced by close friendships with people of many faiths and ethnicities.

We returned to India in 1981; I was alienated because of my parents’ acclimatization set against my inability to fit in to the culture of pre-globalized and pre-outsourced India. I explored the myriad of Hindu traditions foreign to me because of the undeveloped Indian-American diaspora in the 70s. I found truth in the Hindu philosophy my father expounded upon – a faith where all paths are accepted. Ekam Satya, Viprah Bahuda Vadanti[1]. But I felt stifled and out of place socially, and was constantly seeking something, and decided to go home to America to find myself.

Tempest-tossed[2], I returned to NY as a foreign student in 1988 for graduate school. I studied, worked, got married, got a green card and had kids over the next ten years, and slowly achieved stability – marriage and motherhood were key. On relocating to Michigan in 1999, I began to volunteer at the local Hindu temple. Major surgery eventually led me to quit my job and begin a commitment to even more community service. It bothered me when a teacher wasn’t willing to explain the difference between Indians and Native Americans, or when members of the school community were unhappy with including Mahatma Gandhi’s favorite song at the Holiday Sing-Along – especially since we live in Troy, the city with the highest Asian population in Michigan. In 2005, I was refused a part in the City of Troy’s National Day of Prayer, and realized that a Hindu voice was needed at America’s table and that interfaith interaction is important in dispelling ignorance and fear. My neighborhood, my town, my country, my world – today all seem torn apart by an adherence to the belief that one’s own interpretation of beliefs is the only way.

I believe that pluralism is the password for peace, and that it is the promise of my country and my faith. My neighbor the Methodist creates the interfaith organization’s website, my neighbor the Episcopalian coordinates an interfaith Habitat for Humanity build. I break bread with my friend the Republican Congressman to celebrate the Temple expansion, I am honored by my friend the Democratic County Commissioner with a flag flown over the Capitol. My Muslim sister enlightens me about her hijab, my Jewish brother and I walk a labyrinth together on an interfaith pilgrimage. We are each unique and yet so much more than these labels… I am eager to engage people in dialogue, sometimes getting hurt in the process, and make connections so that we do not identify someone as “the other.” I believe in a truly pluralistic[3] society.

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[1] The Truth is One, the Wise call it by many names.

[2] From the poem, “The New Colossus,” describing the Statue of Liberty, by Emma Lazarus.

[3] The belief that no single explanatory system or view of reality can account for all the phenomena of life.

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